Happy New Year!!!! I declare 2016 to be a Year of Miracles! Can I get an Amen?
I started this blog nearly a year ago. My how time flies! I certainly had the best of intentions to be more faithful in writing in it than I’ve been. However, as the saying goes about the best laid plans, mine went to a galaxy far, far awry.
But I’m here now, and that’s all that matters.
When I started this blog, I really wasn’t sure what direction I wanted it to go. One of the reasons I called it “Mining for Diamonds” is because one of the attributes of a diamond is its many facets. I feel that I am a woman of many facets, and it’s hard to narrow down my life or my writing to just one, like the blog gurus say to do. There are so many things I could speak to: marriage, motherhood, music, faith, ministry, mental illness. Those are broad subjects, but I can add so many twists to those topics, and align them with all kinds of Hot Topics of the day, since every headline these days seems to hit some facet of my life head on.
For example, I could speak to marriage to a spouse who is diagnosed mentally ill, in a time when mental illness is still so grossly misunderstood and misrepresented. I could speak to being in an interracial marriage and all that is involved with that, especially being an African American woman married to a Caucasian man in a time of racial unrest and turbulence. I could speak to solo parenting, and parenting an only child who happens to be biracial, a tween, and a girl. I could really say a lot about hair!!! I could go on and on about music and my profession as a classical musician and how that relates to the world at large. I could speak to being a follower of Jesus Christ in a time when religion evokes all kinds of Big Feelings (although I am hard pressed to describe myself as “religious” or “practicing a religion”). Christianity in particular these days is almost like leprosy. Each one of these topics comes with a generous helping of a can of worms that I could feast on for weeks’ and weeks’ worth of blog posts.
Instead, I found myself in 2015 caught in a weird tension of thinking I needed to either be blogging about everything and throwing in my two cents worth on every hot topic, or blogging about nothing and remaining silent. And don’t forget the Twitterizing and Facebooking that goes along with that. Guess which side I ended up on! I found myself paralyzed last year, because I just didn’t know what to say or how to say it.
I don’t consider myself a spokesperson for mental illness, interracial marriage, raising a biracial child, solo parenting, race relations, faith issues and what a Christian should and should not be or believe…and I especially despise politics so I won’t even go there. I don’t like to get on my soapbox and spout off a list of all that is wrong with the world and what should be made right.
What I really wanted to do is simply tell a story of how God helped me find treasures in darkness, how He helped me walk through some of the darkest moments of my life, and find the Light of His goodness in the midst of it.
I think everyone has at least one Dark Place, a difficult challenge, of some sort. For me, it happens to be my marriage. I’ve already done several blog posts on why that has been the case, so feel free to scroll through previous entries for the backstory. But I settled upon the fact that my marriage would be the main topic of this blog.
One of my hopes when I first launched this blog last year, is that it would be a place where I could share the miracle of God’s faithfulness, restoration and reconciliation, recovery and healing, of a marriage that has been ripped apart by mental illness and unresolved trauma.
By God’s grace, I believe that 2016 will yield the fruit of that hope.
For now, I can say that even in the brokenness of our family, God has been and continues to be faithful. I am continually amazed on a daily basis how He takes care of me and my daughter. He has taken care of us when our husband and father could not. I wish everyone could know God’s faithfulness in that same way! But it’s kind of one of those things that you just have to experience for yourself, in order to know it’s true. Some people yearn to know Him in that way, and maybe I can help point the way. Others maybe could care less…and that’s ok too. My story won’t be for them. Still others might not know what they want from God, and maybe they're just curious or can relate in some way to the topic at hand. Hopefully they'll find something too.
But I know that there are many out there who are looking for hope, trying to find some glimmer of light in a dark, dark place…I hope that maybe they’ll find what they’re looking for in my little corner of cyberspace, through my story.
Stay tuned for the rest of 2016…as the Lord leads, I hope to unveil the Mighty Miracle that He has been working behind the scenes. Trust me, it will not disappoint!!!